Funny Interview

  1. Interviewer: Tell me about yourself. 

  2. Candidate: I am Kondesh Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication

  3. engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology. 

  4. **********************************

  5. Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never

  6. heard of this college before!

  7. Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission

  8. into it . What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly in 12th.I

  9. was getting a paid seat in a good college.

  10. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of

  11. money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on

  12. you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao

  13. Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

  14. **********************************

  15. Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your

  16. engineering.

  17. Candidate : Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know ,

  18. these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments..It is

  19. difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 +

  20. 2 = 7 years. 

  21. **********************************

  22. Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6. 

  23. Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to

  24. keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really

  25. affect exams a lot. I think they ! should ban it.

  26. **********************************

  27. Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

  28. Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!! 

  29. **********************************

  30. Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life? 

  31. Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought

  32. I would complete it.

  33. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in

  34. BEST(Bus corporation in Maharashtra ) through some relative...

  35. **********************************

  36. Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study? 

  37. Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself

  38. was so much of pain!! 

  39. **********************************

  40. Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you

  41. worked?

  42. Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current

  43. platform . Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As

  44. you can see I have experience of different platforms ! (Vashi and Andheri

  45. are the places in Mumbai) 

  46. **********************************

  47. Interviewer: And which languages have you used? 

  48. Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German,

  49. French, Russian and ma! ny other languages.

  50. **********************************

  51. Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB? 

  52. Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher

  53. version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new

  54. language VD!

  55. **********************************

  56. Interviewer : Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

  57. Candidate : Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our

  58. ministers and MPs use in assembly .. 

  59. **********************************

  60. Interviewer: What is your general project experience? 

  61. Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of th! e times

  62. they are in pipeline!

  63. **********************************

  64. Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job? 

  65. Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining

  66. BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was

  67. another software like Windows.

  68. **********************************

  69. Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience? 

  70. Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I

  71. can talk a lot. I ! know how to dial for International phone call and use

  72. speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like -

  73. 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines'

  74. , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

  75. **********************************

  76. Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company? 

  77. Candidate: Not much.

  78. 1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.

  79. 2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have

  80. deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent. 

  81. 3. I believe in flexi-timings.

  82. 4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and

  83. jeans. 

  84. 5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wednesday off also, so as to

  85. avoid breakdown due to overwork. 

  86. 6. I wo! uld like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2

  87. months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . But

  88. considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007,I don't

  89. mind going there in that period . As you can see I am modest and don't

  90. have many expectations. So can I assume my selection? 

  91. **********************************

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